Nigel Cawthorne, novinarčić, skriboman i petparački pisac u rangu Semira Osmanagića. Pokušava zaraditi prodajući bombastične naslove polupismenjakovićima. I sudeći po vama uspjeva... Evo nekih remek-djela dotičnog: - Sex Lives series * Sex Lives of the Popes * Sex Lives of the US Presidents * Sex Lives of the Great Dictators * Sex Lives of the Kings and Queens of England * Sex Lives of the Hollywood Goddesses * Sex Lives of the Hollywood Goddesses 2 * Sex Lives of the Hollywood Idols * Sex Lives of the Great Artists * Sex Lives of the Great Composers * Sex Lives of the Famous Gays * Sex Lives of the Famous Lesbians * Sex Lives of the Roman Emperors -Old England series * Strange Laws of Old England * Curious Cures of Old England * Amorous Antics of Old England